preface: i got out of class early and walked to my car. the overcast sky was a bit chilly and sprinkled a bit of rain. but as i drove, the sky got brighter in its overcast state. as i neared my home, admiring the valley from that one view, coldplay came on my iPod singing this song. i could tell it was going to be a longer drive home than i'd originally intended. and i was perfectly fine with that.
i drove to a road where i could better view the sun and west sky, playing that song over and over. the following is the stream of consciousness which resulted.
4:40ish pm--
okay.
currently i've pulled over on the side of the road just to sit here and type. i'm situated in the passenger's side of the car, because i have a better view and there's no steering wheel for my laptop to fight.
here's why.
obviously, it's been a hard few weeks for me. but i'm learning that amidst trials, to not stifle the sunshine spots that come along the way.
literally.
because here's what i'm experiencing from inside my car (in the order of which i'm noticing them from this point on):
raindrops on the windshield and windows
fog on the windows, thanks to my malfunctioning defroster
a hilly road ahead
an orchard on the left
with the skeleton of an old barn
an old neighborhood on the right
and chris martin is crooning "everything's not lost".
the driver's side window is down; i smell rain. walking to my car about half an hour ago, i discovered my new favorite smell: rain and campfire smoke. it wafted by only briefly, a moment or two; that's all it took. done. new favorite.
the air is slightly cool and completely clear. still smells of fresh rain. it's perfect.
a guy just passed me on his run. he has huge headphones; i wonder what he's listening to.
good for him! gosh, what i wouldn't give to go running right now.
the sun is thinking about setting. but not yet. it's stunning. it's in the southwestern sky, completely diffused by clouds, however still super white and completely radiant. white light, not yellow. makes me wonder if this is a similar light quality as in joseph's
vision. there are no traces of the mountains -- the mist completely covers them. for all i know, it's the inversion, but it's beautiful and i honestly don't care. it feels so fresh here.
the gradient in the valley is super subtle: a beautiful light blue into gray into white and there are some yellowish tones above; the warms mixing with cools make it exquisite.
cars pass here and there. it's nice to listen to them come and go.
i love how the bare trees of this orchard across the way look: so stark and sharp, backdropped against the silky smooth sky.
"life in technicolor"…love this song. brings back happy memories.
sun just broke through the clouds and now it's in my eyes. i'm not moving. nope, not one bit. i love the feel of sun on my face, even if it's direct sunlight.
this documentation doesn't do justice to any of this, but it's the only way i can share it, since no one is here to share it with me. which usually feels a little bittersweet. but gratefully, not as much this time.
it's interesting to feel the sun dim and re-light my face.
speaking of my face, i just noticed its reflection on my computer screen; I didn't realize i'm half-smiling. a smirk, kind of. this is just a really nice place to be.
the sun is back to being radiant and bright, creating an amazing looking rim-light on the bare trees.
my fingers are cold. coldish. but it feels good and i like the clicking sound of typing, juxtaposed with the cars passing, the music playing, and the feel of the bass on the ground for my feet to enjoy.
"a rainy day comes round, sometimes i just want it to slow down…"
anyway. wish you were here.
seriously.
postscript:
as i pulled in my driveway, i looked up and saw one single bird silhouetted on the wire against the deep blue sky above my house to greet me. thinking of the original song i'd heard that propelled me to drive on, i grinned and thought this rather fitting to end my little afternoon jaunt.
